Question for the greeks

6 replies · 2637 views · Started by justiFIYAHble · Nov 2005

Oxford, MS

justiFIYAHble Oxford, MS

I have a serious question to ask ya'll because I witnessed something at JSU that kinda hurt my feelings... It hurt me because I have been fascinated with the idea of the Divine 9, how everything came to be, the history, everything. Now I understand that each sorority/fraternity claims one another...And I understand that they have a somewhat brother/sister bond... But...why is that when someone who is non-greek or not a member of that sorority dates a member of the fraternity that they "claim" , the members of said sorority like to act a fool...well I wouldn't say act a fool...but things do get a lil outta hand? It happened to me my freshman year in college, and then to a couple of friends who were fooling around wit some of the ques. That bothered me alot because as I see it...it shouldn't matter who they date because it is not their business...but I really wanna know whats the basis behind situations of that venacular...carry on!

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PGPeripheryGirl from NY, NY · Nov 2005

#1 Reply

justiFIYAHble wrote:
I have a serious question to ask ya'll because I witnessed something at JSU that kinda hurt my feelings... It hurt me because I have been fascinated with the idea of the Divine 9, how everything came to be, the history, everything. Now I understand that each sorority/fraternity claims one another...And I understand that they have a somewhat brother/sister bond... But...why is that when someone who is non-greek or not a member of that sorority dates a member of the fraternity that they "claim" , the members of said sorority like to act a fool...well I wouldn't say act a fool...but things do get a lil outta hand? It happened to me my freshman year in college, and then to a couple of friends who were fooling around wit some of the ques. That bothered me alot because as I see it...it shouldn't matter who they date because it is not their business...but I really wanna know whats the basis behind situations of that venacular...carry on!

Okay. I'll touch on this on. I think that its like that for a number of reasons: women like to date up- just like you're more likely to see a man marrying beneath himself (so to speak) than a woman, you're more likely to see a man dating a girl that's not Greek than a girl. I think, in general, once you're a girl and you become greek you're looking for a Greek guy. When guys cross they all of a sudden have a bunch of girls throwing themselves at them and they can pick anyone. When a girl crosses, guys aren't {CORRECTION) usually lining up to date them now. The guys may be more interested, but it's nothing compared to the reception that dudes get. That being said, girls often look to date who they consider to be their "frat". The whole Phirst Pham/ Coleman Love/ Blue Fam/ Indiana Love thing is something that you're aware of before you cross so in the back of your mind, you're already toying with the idea of being with "frat". So when you see someone who's not Greek dating a Greek guy that you kinda felt entitled to, it kinda bothers you. Think of it loosely as black women who get mad when white women date "their men". Technically, black men are not entitled to us, but we feel that as black women, it's only natural that we should be with someone that is black and we don't understand why someone who isn't black should take up the available black men (because they're kinda sparse in comparison to black women). Now go back to that sentence and replace "black" with "Greek". Personally, if I'm not interested in any members of my so-called frat, I really don't care who they're dating, but I can see why it would be irksome.

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AKAtude from brooklyn, NY · Nov 2005

#2 Reply

PGPeripheryGirl wrote:
Okay. I'll touch on this on. I think that its like that for a number of reasons: women like to date up- just like you're more likely to see a man marrying beneath himself (so to speak) than a woman, you're more likely to see a man dating a girl that's not Greek than a girl. I think, in general, once you're a girl and you become greek you're looking for a Greek guy. When guys cross they all of a sudden have a bunch of girls throwing themselves at them and they can pick anyone. When a girl crosses, guys are usually lining up to date them now. The guys may be more interested, but it's nothing compared to the reception that dudes get. That being said, girls often look to date who they consider to be their "frat". The whole Phirst Pham/ Coleman Love/ Blue Fam/ Indiana Love thing is something that you're aware of before you cross so in the back of your mind, you're already toying with the idea of being with "frat". So when you see someone who's not Greek dating a Greek guy that you kinda felt entitled to, it kinda bothers you. Think of it loosely as black women who get mad when white women date "their men". Technically, black men are not entitled to us, but we feel that as black women, it's only natural that we should be with someone that is black and we don't understand why someone who isn't black should take up the available black men (because they're kinda sparse in comparison to black women). Now go back to that sentence and replace "black" with "Greek". Personally, if I'm not interested in any members of my so-called frat, I really don't care who they're dating, but I can see why it would be irksome.

Good points...although I cant help but label this as one of those taboo situations ohh I just thought about this...another reason why they might "act a fool" may be because.....(maybe it would be better shown if i paint a picture) lets say you are dating an Alpha and Im an AKA you may not actually be intrested in my org but I may assume that since ur dating an Alpha that you might wanna be an AKA so i just may not like you off of that (true or not). It sounds really dumb but you know how us females never really need a clear explination to dislike another female :lol: