THE GUYS RULES(ladies please pay attention, lol)

39 replies · 6112 views · Started by TwilightZone13 · Jul 2004
The Guys' Rules At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down Finally, the guys' side of the story. (I must admit, it's pretty good.) We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE! 1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down. 1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be. 1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way. 1. Crying is blackmail. 1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it! 1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. 1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for. 1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor. 1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days. 1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys. 1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. 1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one. 1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself. 1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials. 1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we. 1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is. 1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that. 1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle. 1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear. 1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really. 1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks. 1. You have enough clothes. 1. You have too many shoes. 1. I am in shape. Round is a shape. 1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; but did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping. DAS REAL..... WHAT YALL THINK? :lol:
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· Jul 2004
#1 Reply
hilariously TRUE.... over the few years i have dated, i have come to realize the truth behind these points... and i don't question them. somethimes it is just the way it is.... :roll:
chrittypie · Jul 2004
#2 Reply
Thats wassup lol...**** :lol:
ManifestDSTiny33 · Jul 2004
#3 Reply
you hit that junk on the nail..I know too many people who live by those rules.. LOL.. good work
· Jul 2004
#4 Reply
i would like to say that I was not the one to write this, but much love 2 the brotha who did... youre an inspiration to us all
Its_like_candie · Jul 2004
#5 Reply
Quote:
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
This was one of the funniest ones!!! **** @ All of them though!!! This really does describe all guys! :lol:
ClassyWisdom08 · Jul 2004
#6 Reply
Sounds like the typical guy to me....
oOoDazzlingDanceroOo · Jul 2004
#7 Reply
:lol: i like that..thats tight.
justiFIYAHble · Jul 2004
#8 Reply
Yeah...for those ladies that don't know...READ THIS AND TAKE HEED or u gone be a mad muthaphucka when you get tha answer u wasn't lookin for or end up alone... Damn it..sometimes tha truth HURTS!!!!!!!!!
· Jul 2004
#9 Reply
those are so very very true.... 1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. ^^^**** at that one
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