DUMB @$#%
|
Posted By: Atlee Jones on July 12, 2005 Darwin Awards - 2005 Yes, it's that magical time of the year again when the Darwin Awards are bestowed, honoring the least evolved among us. Here then, are the glorious winners: 1. When his 38-caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a hold-up in Long Beach, California, would-be robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked . . . And now, the honorable mentions: 2. The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat-cutting machine and, after a little hopping around, submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company expecting negligence sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and lost a finger. The chefs claim was approved. 3. A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her. 4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days. 5. An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious head wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit. 6. A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the counter, and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer . . . $15. (If someone points a gun at you and gives you money, is a crime committed?) 7. Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his head at the window. The cinder block bounced back and hit the would-be thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. The liquor store window was made of Plexiglas. The whole event was caught on videotape. 8. As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately, and the woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher. Within minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher. They put him in the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he replied, "Yes, officer, that's her. That's the lady I stole the purse from." 9. The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a Burger King in Ypsilanti, Michigan, at 5 a.m., flashed a gun, and demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered onion rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast. The man, frustrated, walked away. A 5-STAR STUPIDITY AWARD WINNER! 10. When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor home parked on a Seattle street, he got much more than he bargained for. Police arrived at the scene to find a very sick man curled up next to a motor home near spilled sewage. A police spokesman said that the man admitted to trying to steal gasoline and plugged his siphon hose into the motor home's sewage tank by mistake. The owner of the vehicle declined to press charges, saying that it was the best laugh he'd ever had. In the interest of bettering human kind please share these with your friends and family . . . unless of course, one of these 10 individuals by chance is a distant relative or long lost friend. In that case be glad they are distant and hope they remain lost. If you enjoyed this article, Join HBCU CONNECT today for similar content and opportunities via email! |
 |
Atlee Jones
From Newport News, VA North Carolina A&T State University class of 2009 Member Since March 2005 |
Comments
 |
LMAO!!!! These are some dumb people!!! Good...I needed a laugh...
Tuesday, July 12th 2005 at 6:38PM |
 |
So hilarious...and that's just what I needed
Tuesday, July 12th 2005 at 8:24PM |
 |
oh my...those are some bogus people, that was funny doe...got anymore.
Sunday, July 31st 2005 at 2:18PM |
More From This Author
Latest Blogs
 |
Overcome by My Testimony: I’m a Survivor ShowThese are episodes of my show Overcome by My Testimony: I’m a Survivor where I talk with people that have been through challenges in life but have made it through.
I’m always looking for people wi ...more
Rashon Forrest • 39 Views • March 25th, 2026 |
 |
2026 VW Tiguan SEL R-Line Turbo Packs More PunchSince 2009, the Volkswagen Tiguan has been the brand’s top seller in the U.S., a practical, conservative choice for families who value substance over flash. However, the 2026 model injects a much-need ...more
Randi Payton • 134 Views • March 22nd, 2026 |
 |
2026 VW Tiguan SEL R-Line Turbo Packs More PunchSince 2009, the Volkswagen Tiguan has been the brand’s top seller in the U.S., a practical, conservative choice for families who value substance over flash. However, the 2026 model injects a much-need ...more
Randi Payton • 130 Views • March 22nd, 2026 |
 |
Milwaukee's Own Independent Artist SO GLO Releases New Single "Herski"@SOGLO #SOGLO
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/_sommeerr2?utm_source=ig_web_button_share_sheet&igsh=ZDNlZDc0MzIxNw==
Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@_sommeerr2?is_from_webapp=1&sender_devi ...more
LaMarr Blackmon • 220 Views • March 19th, 2026 |
 |
Legendary Soul Singer EDDIE LEVERT Is Back Bringing More Passion, Romance & Soul With New Single "Let’s Go To My Place"@EDDIELEVERT #EDDIELEVERT
New Single
"Let’s Go To My Place"
https://youtu.be/GXNrCEOuJkM
https://linktr.ee/eddielevertsr?fbclid=PAAaasGYElQcaMrAEYn5bSEVM1DNbxnB2Q2jcTvb3KBrR1MIFBYDHQ8CdSId8
...more
LaMarr Blackmon • 366 Views • March 18th, 2026 |
Popular Blogs
 |
Divorce in America in 2009 – What’s love got to do, got to do with it?
Join Brother Marcus and the cast and the crew of the Brother Marcus Show live this Sunday evening on February 1, 2009 @ 8:00 p.m. for another hot topic in our community! “Divorce in America in 2009 ...more
Brother Marcus! • 70,931,756 Views • January 27th, 2009 |
 |
VISINE ALERT!!!Seemingly innocent medication such as Visine eyedrops are used by people to concoct a mixture with similar effects as a date-rape drug.
When mixed with alcohol and taken orally, the eyedrops can l ...more
Siebra Muhammad • 118,763 Views • May 23rd, 2009 |
 |
"Chain Hang Low" check out the real meaning of the Lyrics!Recently there is a new artist out of Saint Louis that goes by the name JIBBS. Jibbs debut single "Chain hang low" has a history that most people are not aware of. The particular nursery rhyme that th ...more
Tyhesha Judge-Fogle • 76,505 Views • November 9th, 2006 |
 |
HBCU Marketplace Gifts: Divine 9 Premium Fraternity / Sorority Playing CardsVendor: Charles Jones
Item Price: $20.00
Price Includes Shipping: Yes - Shipping Included
Item Description:
Pantheon Series - Divine 9 - Premium Playing Cards (choose Gold Series or Silve ...more
How May I Help You NC • 62,025 Views • December 2nd, 2018 |
