Kool love the kids
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Posted By: Damein on March 29, 2005 I'm getting old. The highlight of my weekend was spending a few hours with my family (mainly, the baby cousins) out in the country Friday nite. Whenever you see/hear me mention 'The Country", I'm referring to this little town about 25 miles west of Huntsville. Those little kids have grown up so fast...I can't believe that the youngest one is almost 4. See, I kinda got this soft spot for children. My mom has been a foster parent since 1991. Since then, we've adopted 3, (two of them live with my aunt because she has ALL their other brothers), and we've fostered 2 different little girls, and 4 other boys. Fostered means 'temporarily kept'...adoption is permanent. Most, if not all, of those kids came from BAD parents. Mothers that did drugs, sold their bodies, or just didn't want to raise their kid. Fathers that beat up on the mom & child...Fathers that molested the kids...I've heard it all. The first 2 boys she adopted were unidentical twins that came from a crack addict....so in turn, they had the drugs in their systems. To this day, both of them have some sort of issue when it comes to containing their anger, focusing on one thing at a time (ADD), and a number of other problems. They are now in 6th grade, and they live with their other 4 brothers. It seems like yesterday when we watched that little white lady bring us these 2 newborn twins...now I'm teaching them the in's and out's about life, school, sports and women. The first girl that mom fostered was this adorable little 5 day old girl that was born on May 1st 1996. We kept her until 1998, when her father in New York re-gained custody of her. The second little girl was with us for about a year and a half. She hated us at first, but when it was time for her to leave to live with her mom in Birmingham, she didn't want to leave! We kept this other little boy for about 4 months. His mom had to get "back on her feet" and was unable to provide adequate shelter for him. We now have 2 boys...ages 3 and 5. They're HARD to live with sometimes, but we deal with them the best way we can. My mom isn't getting any younger, but that woman has a heart made of gold. She's been a mother to more than just her only biological son (me)....She taught me how to be a father figure when, at times, I didn't want to be one. So I know the depth of that woman's knowledge and patience! Through all the kids that have been in and out of this house, I miss the hell out of each and every one of them. Some more than others, but they all have this soft spot in my heart. It gets hard seeing them taken away from their real family, tho. Thats the most heartbreaking thing a brotha can think of. Listening a child cry & kick itself to sleep every night because they're bouncing from home to home. They dont really know whats going on...but they dont like it. As soon as they get settled and familiar with one family, they've gotta go to a different family. I couldn't begin to describe the painful emotion that strikes me everytime I meet a new kid and hear their story from the social worker. It's just painful and heartbreaking. Thats why I made a promise to myself that I'll never abandon my child(ren). I couldn't see myself doing so bad that I couldn't provide for my kids. It's just something I refuse to do. My pops was always around, but the father/son stuff that guys are supposed to do with/learn from their dads...I had to learn it through trial and error. I had to fall a few times before I figured some things out...things that could've been taught to me...things that I could've learned from someone who's already been there before. But I dont regret it one bit. I love my mom and dad like nobody else can love their parents, but mental/emotional detachment from my father that I've had to live with for all these years have made me a better man. Until next time... If you enjoyed this article, Join HBCU CONNECT today for similar content and opportunities via email! |
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Damein
From Huntsville, AL Alabama A&M University class of 2006 Member Since September 2003 |
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